Pruning

Writing is my life. I enjoy it and - remember that one R.A. Salvatore quote? *wink, wink* - I couldn't just not write. But writing isn't all roses and butterflies, all fun and games. I wish it was. Yes, I do wish it was.

I'm bringing up this topic because of a writing experience I just had. I'm growing as a writer, like all of you, and learning new things and being taught new lessons. Is that fun? In some ways, yes, it is. But on the other hand, does pruning always feel good? No, of course not.

I'm being pruned, and a certain cutting off of a branch hit me hard recently, so I'm going to share that story with you. :)

I'm kind.

We all have our strengths and we all have our weaknesses, and it's good to know your own strengths and weaknesses. It took me forever to be able to admit my own strengths,  but admitting the weaknesses came far too easily. I'm too much of a critic for my own good. :)

I am just naturally a kind person. That's how God made me.

As you can imagine, that makes it really hard to hurt my characters. *pauses* Well, that's not entirely true. I've hurled all kinds of mental "roadblocks" on them, inflicted with them impossible missions, pain, loss, and all kinds of fun stuff like that. ;) But they've always remained relatively (physically) unharmed. They were all sore, bruised, and had minor injuries, but that didn't prepare me.
One character suffered an awful injury. I didn't want that to happen, but it happened. I couldn't take it out, because it was necessary to the story. It took me a while to get over it, but I did.

Finally, I got over my shock. I couldn't believe that I had written that. In spite of the pain it cost me, it got out there and it wasn't too bad. It needs pruning and it needs work, but it isn't too bad. Why? Because I had felt every word with my heart. It had pained me, and I had poured out my soul. It was hard for me to write, but sometimes, the hard scenes end up being the best.

Then, another thing happened. I had to wound a character far deeper than I ever had before. Physically, which as I said, is harder for me. Much deeper than the wounds inflicted on the Anonymous Character mentioned above. And it hurt. Every word felt like salt on a wound: Painful.

I still haven't gotten over that one scene, having written it just today. But you know what? I will. I'll get over it, and I'll be a stronger writer in spite of it and because of it.

It will hurt. But the pruning is what lets better things blossom out.

-Autumn